Toilet Paper Wedding Dress

My coworker Katie, the one who gives me the tomatoes off of her salad and lets me pick out the least-beer-y beer for her, had her bridal shower today. Much to my delight, it wasn't horrible! We had a good time! The food was great, her family is really entertaining, and I probably had one glass of champagne spiked punch too many, considering it was two o'clock in the afternoon. She looked beautiful, got a million gifts, and wasn't too embarrassed by the box "to be shared with your husband."

But you see, my first real bridal shower left a bit of a sour taste in my mouth. She was my neighbor growing up- she was nineteen, and had been dating her fiance since sixteen. There was food, presents, relatives, the usual ho-hum. Then the games began. If you've ever been to a bridal shower, I'm sure you've played this game too. The toilet paper wedding dress game. (Katie, if you're reading this, I know that I just used a fragment sentence.) I was actually pretty psyched- at the time I considered myself something of an artist. My sister was the model and I made the best looking toilet paper dress in five minutes. It had a fitted bodice, trumpet skirt down to her calves, it really looked like a dress! However, it lost to a dress with a plastic cup bra a la Madonna modeled by some elderly, overweight aunt or something. Everyone thought it was hilarious! I was furious, and vowed never to play the game again OR to have fun at a bridal shower again.

I had just finished telling this story to Kelly, when some Memere came out with five rolls of unwrapped toilet paper. We looked at each other as soon as we saw them with the expression, "Holy Shit!" With Pauline, our boss, who is another veteran toilet paper dress maker, my coworkers and I made a dress so stunningly beautiful it will be remembered by all who was there to witness it. I'm not sure if I'd told this tragic tale to Katie or not, but she picked our dress! Redemption!

There will be a picture, eventually, but until then, look what I found when I Googled toilet paper wedding dress:



Apparently, there are contests...